Nation rejoices as Sports Minister Vijay Goel’s selfies count exceeds US medal tally

As the country dissected its Olympics performance in Rio, Sports Minister Vijay Goel gave it a reason to cheer as he declared the number of selfies he took at Rio exceeded the number of medals won by the USA which topped the tally.

“200 selfies!” beamed an excited Goel as he finished counting. “That’s 100 times the medals we won. High five!”

Mr. Goel felt as a sports minister his performance could have been much better but he had to divide his precious time judiciously because of other menial responsibilities like providing athletes with moral support and other things.

“Thankfully, overall our athletes were mature and had a good understanding of the whims and fancies of politicians unlike foreign sportspersons. Hence I could somehow manage 200 clicks which included selfies with medal winners of other countries too,” said Goel.

But with success comes more responsibility. Mr. Goel is not yet ready to rest on his laurels. He is already geared up for 2020 Tokyo Olympics. “Our Prime Minister Narendra Modiji is a very demanding leader. He has already asked for a road map for the next Olympic games,” said the sports minister as he flaunted his selfie with a tired Usain Bolt near the finish line.

Asked about the Indian athletes’ performance in the just-concluded Olympics, Goel said he was surprised by the Indian contingent’s performance despite the existing hurdles set up by his own ministry.

“Hats off to these athletes. I mean how can anyone take this much of shit and still compete at the highest level?” said a blunt Goel.

Goel’s feat of taking record number of selfies has not just made India proud but forced sporting powers to take note.

The Unites States of America was stunned to learn about the Indian sports minister’s achievement. It is in fact planning to emulate India and appoint a sports minister for the first time in its history.

A US Olympic committee member said, “After all, what do we do with the surplus budgeted money that remains after spending on the athletes? With that surplus, we too can send a sports minister to the Olympics and boast of his achievements like India does.”


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